To: Anyone who reads this

I'm not trying to convert you or anything. Goodness, can you imagine? But I do want to say some things I've been afraid to tell anyone for a long time.
I hated myself. My face, my voice, my body, my mind. Everything. Because I thought I was a terrible person. I actually thought I drove someone to try to commit suicide. Let me explain some things. I'm the youngest child. I'm so used to getting what I want. Including my friends. Or at least I was. So sure, I felt a little bad about ripping her best friend in half between best friends. But hey, that's life. Right? I thought so. I wanted a friend and she was standing in my way. I didn't do anything BAD. I just pulled. Nothing extreme.
And then that stupid call in the middle of the night. I felt the retribution of my actions. So for the past year( it happened on April 25th) I've thought that I was the(for lack of a better word) B**** that made that girl, my ex best friend, want to end her life.
So I hated myself. I was such a *insert previous word here* And I stopped my search for religion. And I stopped wanting to be happy. And I started wanting to kill myself.
And then, a little more than a week ago, I heard this amazing story from an amazing girl who is now in the Top 5 of my best friend list. And she opened my eyes. Her name is Patricia-Faith.
And two days ago, I went back to her church, and I'll put the song on here in a minute. But everything I was feeling was just lifted off my chest. And I told her EVERYTHING. And I hate crying in front of people but geez, I needed it.
And I know it won't be easy. I've lived out of the light for so long its a wonder I found myself back. But Lord, thank you so much. I'm finally free.